From Romania
by Omnicat
Summary: Jane brought home another dodgy homeless bodybuilder. Darcy should probably... uh... she could've sworn there was a thought that didn't involve ogling the guy there just a second ago...


**Title:** From Romania

**Author:** Omnicat

**Spoilers & Desirable Foreknowledge:** Thor, Thor: the Dark World, Captain America: the First Avenger, Captain America: the Winter Soldier, and Captain America: Civil War.

**Warnings:** None.

**Characters & Relationships:** Bucky x Jane & Darcy

**Summary:** Jane brought home another dodgy homeless bodybuilder. Darcy should probably... uh... she could've sworn there was a thought that didn't involve ogling the guy there just a second ago... **/ 756 words**

**Author's Note:** Not Civil War-compliant. Enjoy!

**II-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-I-oOo-I-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-o-II**

**From Romania**

It was a bright, sunny December afternoon promising to turn into a clear, moonlit December night. In other words, it was freezing-your-butt off cold and only about to get worse. Or in yet other words, a typical Jane Foster workday. Darcy wished she'd had someone to bet with about whether Jane had thought to prepare her new intern for the working conditions. Easy money, right there.

With her cardboard take-away tray of coffee cups, fur-lined boots, and three layers of clothing per body part, she made her way through the long grass to where Jane's equipment was set up on a collection of tarps. She was greeted by the sounds of humming generators and Jane calling out instructions.

"Hey, Jane," Darcy said, coming up behind. "Welcome back to the homeland."

"Darcy!" Jane cried out joyfully, which was how Darcy knew what she really meant was 'coffee!'. Jane snatched up one of the cups, and a witty remark was about to come rolling off Darcy's tongue when she caught sight of the new hire and froze in her tracks.

"Holy cow, who's the new homeless hunk?"

Jane only scowled a little at her volume, maybe because she'd gotten used to such outbursts over time, or maybe because she was already halfway through her coffee.

"My new intern. Darcy, meet Bucky," she said once she was breathing again, and raised her voice. "Hey Bucky, this is Darcy, the other intern. Say hi."

"Hi." Bucky came up to them, took a coffee, nodded his thanks, and promptly went back to connecting cables. Not much of a chatterbox, apparently.

"Hi yourself," Darcy drawled at his backside. She lowered her voice in that way that required no actual lowering of her voice. "Where did you find this guy?"

"Romania."

Darcy had a record scratch moment.

"_Romania?_" She tore her eyes away from Bucky. "When were you in Romania? I thought you were visiting your mom."

For all that Jane's voice had been light and airy, she had been staring too. Now, not anymore, her eyes darting furtively. "Uh..."

"_Why_ were you in Romania."

"Sightseeing," Jane said. It was only barely not a question. "Trip within a trip. Mom's idea."

"What's there to sightsee in _Romania?_"

"_Him._"

"...yeah, okay, that's fair."

This man had shoulders like an ox and really _nice_ hobo hair. He was no Thor, but short of any more sufficiently advanced god-like aliens, he was definitely a worthy substitute. Why had she cared where Jane had gotten him from again?

"And very clear skies," Jane added.

"No, it's okay, that was plenty."

"Dracula's castle," Jane went on doggedly.

Darcy frowned. "Dracula lived in Transylvania."

"Transylvania is in Romania."

"Wait, really? I always thought Transylvania was fake, like Narnia."

"Nope," Jane said, and grabbed her second coffee.

"Huh," Darcy said, thoroughly distracted from anything that wasn't the way that guy's biceps strained against his lab coat. "Neat."

Jane bent over a laptop whirring away on a nearby table while Darcy watched Bucky work. Jane seemed nervous about something – ooh, maybe she hadn't been to Romania at all, maybe he was a mail-order groom she'd ordered on a whim, obviously both countries being in the EU made shipping between Romania and England super fast – but relaxed eventually. Bucky didn't seem to tire or feel the cold, even when the sun dipped fully below the horizon. He just kept on bending over, and lifting things up, and obeying every word Jane said, and generally being hotter than a portable heater on a midnight in December.

"Hey, Jane?" Darcy said after a while. "Why's the new intern wearing a lab coat?"

Jane didn't even bother looking up. "Because he's a professional."

"You don't make me wear a lab coat."

"He's more professional than you."

Darcy made a wounded noise. Then she thought of something. "You don't make _you_ wear a lab coat. We study space and wavelength particles, there's no point. _Your_ words."

"He's more professional than me," Jane claimed, perfectly straight-faced.

"...okay. Hey, Jane?"

"Yes, Darcy," she sighed.

"Why's the new intern wearing glasses he clearly doesn't need?"

As if on cue, Bucky took them off to read the label on a box.

"To look smarter. I hired him for his looks."

Darcy honestly couldn't tell anymore if Jane was joking or not. The poker face was too strong.

"Do you think I look smart?" she asked.

"No."

"Wow. Thanks."

"He doesn't either, it's just for effect."

"But... if the effect doesn't work..."

"Don't overthink it."

Darcy was only too happy not to.


End file.
